This was beautifully written and so insightful. This is attunement and mirroring at it's finest! To be able to respond to your child in such a sensitive way communicates deep presence and builds trust in self and the world. This is internalised and is the foundation of a life where anything is possible.
I think your lactation consultant was very clever in allowing you to lean into figuring it out for yourself.
So much deep wisdom is within when we allow ourselves to disconnect with the 'rational mind' which is the programming and connect with our higher selves. 💖
Having raised 5 children over 40 years (my oldest is 42 and youngest 21) I can relate to the lessons of this post so much. It was when I realized they were my children, this is my life, and I don't have to conform to anyone's standards about how I interact with my children that my life became much more enjoyable. This extended into education too, btw. I mostly unschooled the last three. They all are highly functioning adults starting families of their own.
Jill, you rock! 5 children, the realization and also unschooling, wow. I believe you have much experience to offer in these areas. I wish to know more people who know unschooled adults and you actually raised them already. 🙂 Thanks for reaching out and commenting!
YES to following your instincts and embracing natural rhythms over schedules! This is how I parent too. Breastfeeding/contact napping/bedsharing...while yes it's harder at times, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love the closeness with my son in this years - I can tell it's solidifying our bond for life.
Oh Tash, you make me wanna cry and you know I am on the edge of it anyway today 💕 This is mostly why I am doing this, to connect with others and build a tribe. Thank you for finding me and for your support 🙏🏻
What a great article. Thank you so much for sharing from your vulnerability and how it nurtured into strength. It definitely was worth the wait. A very valid topic. Some medical advises can be so logical and cognitive centred, without the use of the emotional underpinning. Sometimes its just the book knowledge without experience. We need both to be able to find the balanced wisdom. And isnt it crazy how in todays society we are trained to be out of touch of our instincts when that is the most central aspect of our humanity and survival. That ancestral insticts and gut feeling is very powerful and what helps us connect to others. Being conscious and mindful of our bodies and inner instincts is so essential.
Thank you so much, Maria Ann, for your thoughtful and heartfelt comment. You’ve perfectly captured what seems to be missing in much of modern Western medicine. Do you have personal experience with healing a condition holistically?
It’s true—our society has become so disconnected from instincts and ancestral wisdom. Yet, I find it so encouraging to see so many people on Substack rediscovering this primal knowledge. I’m deeply committed to fostering these interpersonal connections and sharing this wisdom through my writing. It’s inspiring to see that you’re already contributing to this important movement so beautifully.
This was interesting. My oldest daughter was a micro-preemie and weighed 2 lb 8 oz. For her first 7 months, she had to bed fed every 3 hours on the dot. (I wasn’t able to breastfeed for my own medical reasons.) For much of that she was only allowed to bottle feed for 10 minutes and then I would have to give through a tube. This struggle to feed my daughter made me realize who resilient babies truly are and that we really do need to give ourselves some grace. Although we want things to be perfect, it is not necessary for them to be so in order to have a happy and healthy child. My daughter is now 28 years old and a mama of her own daughter. She just finished a year of exclusively pumping and is pregnant again!
Thank you for sharing such a personal and touching story, Migraine Girl. I can only imagine how challenging those early days of motherhood must have been for you. It’s so true that things often don’t go exactly as we hope, but your experience really highlights the resilience of both babies and parents. Were you able to have any skin-to-skin contact with your baby during that time?
And what wonderful news at the end of your comment—congratulations! How does it feel to watch this next chapter unfold as a grandmother?
This was beautifully written and so insightful. This is attunement and mirroring at it's finest! To be able to respond to your child in such a sensitive way communicates deep presence and builds trust in self and the world. This is internalised and is the foundation of a life where anything is possible.
I think your lactation consultant was very clever in allowing you to lean into figuring it out for yourself.
So much deep wisdom is within when we allow ourselves to disconnect with the 'rational mind' which is the programming and connect with our higher selves. 💖
Having raised 5 children over 40 years (my oldest is 42 and youngest 21) I can relate to the lessons of this post so much. It was when I realized they were my children, this is my life, and I don't have to conform to anyone's standards about how I interact with my children that my life became much more enjoyable. This extended into education too, btw. I mostly unschooled the last three. They all are highly functioning adults starting families of their own.
Jill, you rock! 5 children, the realization and also unschooling, wow. I believe you have much experience to offer in these areas. I wish to know more people who know unschooled adults and you actually raised them already. 🙂 Thanks for reaching out and commenting!
YES to following your instincts and embracing natural rhythms over schedules! This is how I parent too. Breastfeeding/contact napping/bedsharing...while yes it's harder at times, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love the closeness with my son in this years - I can tell it's solidifying our bond for life.
Exactly, this is the base for life 🩵
What a beautiful story and growth in power! I’m glad I’ve found you and connected 💕 You sound like a wonderful mother and special human!
Oh Tash, you make me wanna cry and you know I am on the edge of it anyway today 💕 This is mostly why I am doing this, to connect with others and build a tribe. Thank you for finding me and for your support 🙏🏻
What a great article. Thank you so much for sharing from your vulnerability and how it nurtured into strength. It definitely was worth the wait. A very valid topic. Some medical advises can be so logical and cognitive centred, without the use of the emotional underpinning. Sometimes its just the book knowledge without experience. We need both to be able to find the balanced wisdom. And isnt it crazy how in todays society we are trained to be out of touch of our instincts when that is the most central aspect of our humanity and survival. That ancestral insticts and gut feeling is very powerful and what helps us connect to others. Being conscious and mindful of our bodies and inner instincts is so essential.
Thank you so much, Maria Ann, for your thoughtful and heartfelt comment. You’ve perfectly captured what seems to be missing in much of modern Western medicine. Do you have personal experience with healing a condition holistically?
It’s true—our society has become so disconnected from instincts and ancestral wisdom. Yet, I find it so encouraging to see so many people on Substack rediscovering this primal knowledge. I’m deeply committed to fostering these interpersonal connections and sharing this wisdom through my writing. It’s inspiring to see that you’re already contributing to this important movement so beautifully.
This was interesting. My oldest daughter was a micro-preemie and weighed 2 lb 8 oz. For her first 7 months, she had to bed fed every 3 hours on the dot. (I wasn’t able to breastfeed for my own medical reasons.) For much of that she was only allowed to bottle feed for 10 minutes and then I would have to give through a tube. This struggle to feed my daughter made me realize who resilient babies truly are and that we really do need to give ourselves some grace. Although we want things to be perfect, it is not necessary for them to be so in order to have a happy and healthy child. My daughter is now 28 years old and a mama of her own daughter. She just finished a year of exclusively pumping and is pregnant again!
Thank you for sharing such a personal and touching story, Migraine Girl. I can only imagine how challenging those early days of motherhood must have been for you. It’s so true that things often don’t go exactly as we hope, but your experience really highlights the resilience of both babies and parents. Were you able to have any skin-to-skin contact with your baby during that time?
And what wonderful news at the end of your comment—congratulations! How does it feel to watch this next chapter unfold as a grandmother?