There is so much in this post that I have become aware of myself and that I see with the individuals and families I work with.
On a personal level, I know that I need low demand time to thrive and not just because a slow life is trending on social media. For me, as a neurodivergent it's as important as the air I breathe. It's during these times that my soul speaks to me. It allows me to tune in to the guidance from my higher self, my anscestors and spirit.
As a therapist, I no longer feel upset when I see people's lives collapsing around them because I know that it's showing them what's not working. Last week, I sat with a beautiful couple, their eyes filled with tears, the fear palpable. Their little girl is struggling, she's recently been diagnosed with AuDHD, she is highly anxious, is experiencing sensory overload and is overwhelmed by life's demands. They were overwhelmed by life's demands too, it was taking them three hours to get her to school in the mornings and they both had demanding jobs.
I could see how much love they had for both their children, and I knew they were all going to be okay, but I also knew that in that moment, they didn't know that. What they needed, amongst other things was deep presence so they could make meaning of this experience. I can see that this is what you gave your baby - we all need this when we do not yet know how to move forward.
As I sat with them on the precipice of the unknown, it was crystal clear to me - I could see that this child was the harbinger of change. She came here to align them with their most important values. My heart simultaneously broke for them while at the same time rejoicing because I felt that this was strongly connected to their life purpose and would ultimately change so much about their lives for the better.
I could write so much about this .... it's so wonderful to connect with others on this journey and to know we are part of a collective. 💜
“I need low demand time to thrive” resonates deeply with me, I would even add “alone”.
Thank you for sharing your practical example from a therapist point of view. I am sure my daughter simply had to show me the way (boldly) and thanks to her we now live completely different life than most people around us. And thanks to that I am writing here about it.
And please please write more, your posts are great and so deep and resonating 💕
Thank you Selene. Your writing also deeply resonates. I'm finding being on here really life changing. As a deeply sensitive person - I feel like I've found my tribe. 💜
I realized that understanding my child starts with understanding myself - This resonated with me so much. I think the most difficult part for me was understanding where she (my daughter), I, and "we" exist as individuals and as a unit. She challenges parts of me that I once thought were fixed, and through that, I’ve learned so much—about myself, about growth, and about seeing the world through her eyes. I also try to learn from her as much as I can—her perspective, her way of experiencing the world. After the first six years, this is the first time that, through writing, I’m finally able to express the raw parts of myself that I felt I lost after pregnancy. It feels like a piece of me is returning.
This is so beautiful to read, Elisabeth. And how you are learning from your daughter, wow. And yes, it takes a lot more time than society usually gives us mothers to 'get back,' even though we know so much has changed that there is no way back, right?
Another great piece, loveley Selene. Being a mental health professional, who personally struggled with authoritarian parenting, it is so inspiring and empowering to see how a new parent can still choose to respond and educate and learn and be a good enough parent. It is the intention and attitude, coming from place of love and curiosity, that makes one more than good enough. I really loved your mention of really poignant and powerful concepts. Sometimes I wish our culture had a way of normalising these learnings. You are so right in the village not being there and how we sometimes need to build that ourselves. I really look forward to your articles. Continue to write and share pleae. Xx
Thank you, Maria Ann, for your support and kind words. You are describing my reasons for sharing my life with others. We can always choose a conscious path a create more meaningful life for us and our children. It is just a little but harder if that has not been the case in our childhood or in society we live in.
This is so obvious to me, I don't even know where the premise 'I am an adult, already finished, and you, as my child, can only learn from me' came from.
Maybe it's only sensitive people who feel this way towards their children?
There is so much in this post that I have become aware of myself and that I see with the individuals and families I work with.
On a personal level, I know that I need low demand time to thrive and not just because a slow life is trending on social media. For me, as a neurodivergent it's as important as the air I breathe. It's during these times that my soul speaks to me. It allows me to tune in to the guidance from my higher self, my anscestors and spirit.
As a therapist, I no longer feel upset when I see people's lives collapsing around them because I know that it's showing them what's not working. Last week, I sat with a beautiful couple, their eyes filled with tears, the fear palpable. Their little girl is struggling, she's recently been diagnosed with AuDHD, she is highly anxious, is experiencing sensory overload and is overwhelmed by life's demands. They were overwhelmed by life's demands too, it was taking them three hours to get her to school in the mornings and they both had demanding jobs.
I could see how much love they had for both their children, and I knew they were all going to be okay, but I also knew that in that moment, they didn't know that. What they needed, amongst other things was deep presence so they could make meaning of this experience. I can see that this is what you gave your baby - we all need this when we do not yet know how to move forward.
As I sat with them on the precipice of the unknown, it was crystal clear to me - I could see that this child was the harbinger of change. She came here to align them with their most important values. My heart simultaneously broke for them while at the same time rejoicing because I felt that this was strongly connected to their life purpose and would ultimately change so much about their lives for the better.
I could write so much about this .... it's so wonderful to connect with others on this journey and to know we are part of a collective. 💜
Thank you Rebecca for your insights.
“I need low demand time to thrive” resonates deeply with me, I would even add “alone”.
Thank you for sharing your practical example from a therapist point of view. I am sure my daughter simply had to show me the way (boldly) and thanks to her we now live completely different life than most people around us. And thanks to that I am writing here about it.
And please please write more, your posts are great and so deep and resonating 💕
Thank you Selene. Your writing also deeply resonates. I'm finding being on here really life changing. As a deeply sensitive person - I feel like I've found my tribe. 💜
I realized that understanding my child starts with understanding myself - This resonated with me so much. I think the most difficult part for me was understanding where she (my daughter), I, and "we" exist as individuals and as a unit. She challenges parts of me that I once thought were fixed, and through that, I’ve learned so much—about myself, about growth, and about seeing the world through her eyes. I also try to learn from her as much as I can—her perspective, her way of experiencing the world. After the first six years, this is the first time that, through writing, I’m finally able to express the raw parts of myself that I felt I lost after pregnancy. It feels like a piece of me is returning.
This is so beautiful to read, Elisabeth. And how you are learning from your daughter, wow. And yes, it takes a lot more time than society usually gives us mothers to 'get back,' even though we know so much has changed that there is no way back, right?
Another great piece, loveley Selene. Being a mental health professional, who personally struggled with authoritarian parenting, it is so inspiring and empowering to see how a new parent can still choose to respond and educate and learn and be a good enough parent. It is the intention and attitude, coming from place of love and curiosity, that makes one more than good enough. I really loved your mention of really poignant and powerful concepts. Sometimes I wish our culture had a way of normalising these learnings. You are so right in the village not being there and how we sometimes need to build that ourselves. I really look forward to your articles. Continue to write and share pleae. Xx
Thank you, Maria Ann, for your support and kind words. You are describing my reasons for sharing my life with others. We can always choose a conscious path a create more meaningful life for us and our children. It is just a little but harder if that has not been the case in our childhood or in society we live in.
This is so obvious to me, I don't even know where the premise 'I am an adult, already finished, and you, as my child, can only learn from me' came from.
Maybe it's only sensitive people who feel this way towards their children?